Hey why don’t you jump in the coffin to see if you like it! WHAT, no that’s not me shoveling dirt on you, it rains dirt around here! Boy it’s so hot and dirt right now I feel bad having not told you! What, why am I removing the ladder?! Well for the experience of course, how else will you know if you like it?! Boy what a dumb question that was! Hey do you wanna see how dark it gets inside?! Just duck your head for a second! No I won’t close it on ya, horse snot, yes I meant of course not. WHAT?! I can’t hear you with the coffin closed sir! Oh I’m just gonna undo the straps, be ready for a stiff jolt won’t ya! OH gee, your sideways in the grave, well I’ll see ya! Thanks for calling me pal and slapping me hard on the back! Yeah, I guess I did mind afterall, so whatever! Oh wait, is this your wallet in my hand?! Huh, it is isn’t it, I need an all your money loan, thanks again PAL! OH one last thing, your girlfriend’s hot I’m gonna ask her out! OH I’m stealing your car too, she’s a beut’! What?! You hate me and I’m gonna pay?! No payment necessary I’m taking your house too, thanks again pally I minded the slap I guess! At some point you gotta stop being such a jerk and stop slapping people, like when you’re in a coffin being buried alive! There’s a shovel in the coffin,sir, you can dig your way out! Just kidding there isn’t one, just wanted one last dashing of your hopes, enjoy pal!
Boy this IS a snug coffin, does it have a coffee maker?!
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Bahahahaha, nice
Haven’t enjoyed a one-sided conversation so much in a while.
Thank you! What’s that, no I’m not putting you in a sack don’t be silly!
I like this, my kind of twisted tale! Well done
Thank you, but who says it’s a tale? I’m just debating cement or a good pea soup to seal pal in, any suggestions?!
Pea soup – it’s more eco-friendly and aesthetically it blends in with the grass better. Downside – difficult to walk over.
Good story. Another fine selection of words put in the right order for enjoyment. Keep them coming.
Thank you! I let the word floweth.
I enjoyed reading this piece but I really loved the title!!!!!!
Again thank you! Am I pushing you towards the lion’s den? NO, it’s obviously the wind and not my hands around your neck!
So I guess no alarm bell comes with all this? You’re writing is hilarious!
Alarm bells are for deer carcases and birds with smoking problems! Huh, did I just shove you in the oven? Of course not, it’s a tanning bed! Here comes the sun do da doity!